The Strike-Out Zone

#WorstPickUpLines was trending on Twitter recently, and the results were painfully amusing. Crafting a smooth ice-breaker is hard, but coming up with a way to flub it? All too easy.

And When the Sky Was Opened1

You might assume that the men and women of The Twilight Zone, with their classy wardrobes and a sense of style that’s sadly absent today, would have it easier than those of us stuck in a more “normal” dimension. But that’s not the case. You can swing and miss even in a world replete with sly genies, magic spells and love potions.

Which led me to create this list of 10 TZ-style #WorstPickUpLines …

Kind of Stopwatch1

  1. “I think I saw a man on the wing. Mind if I lean over your lap to get a better look?”
  2. “My name is Talky Tina, and I want to buy you a drink.”
  3. “Looks like that 11th operation really did the trick.”
  4. “Little Anthony would send me to the cornfield in a flash for all the BAD thoughts I’m thinking about you.”
  5. “I’ve got a special stopwatch I’d like to show you … back at my place.”
  6. “I’d love to be YOUR howling man.”
  7. Wanna tour my bomb shelter?
  8. “You don’t need a coin to land on its edge to know what I’M thinking.”
  9. “Going … my way?”
  10. “I just asked the Mystic Seer if I should ask you out, and he said, ‘There’s no question about it’.”

In the end, it might be best to do what Roger Shackleforth did. Contact Professor Daemon and ask about one of those love potions. They cost only a dollar apiece, and they work like gangbusters.

2 (4)

 Though you may want to have at least $1,000 in a savings account somewhere first. Just a thought.

***

Photos courtesy of Wendy Brydge. For a daily dose of Serling, you can follow me on Twitter, Facebook or Pinterest. You can also get email notifications of future posts by entering your address under “Follow S&S Via Email” on the upper left-hand side of this post. WordPress followers, just hit “follow” at the top of the page.

Hope to see you in some corner of the fifth dimension soon!

 

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About Paul

Fanning about the work of Rod Serling all over social media. If you enjoy pics, quotes, facts and blog posts about The Twilight Zone, Night Gallery and Serling's other projects, you've come to the right place.

Posted on 09/11/2013, in Twilight Zone and tagged , . Bookmark the permalink. 10 Comments.

  1. Ha! I love it when you do these kind of lists. # 2 and #6 is especially funny!

    Some others that spring to mind…

    “Buy you a short drink from a certain fountain?”
    “I’m a monster, babe, and I’m due on *your* street.”
    “It’s Wednesday night, and on Thursday, I leave for home, so…”

    There’s a fine line between these and those creepy TZ Valentines, isn’t there? :)

    Thanks for another fun post!

    • Thanks, Mike! I enjoy slotting the funny posts in among the serious ones. And your suggestions are great — as usual! You always come up with some very funny ones, and fast. Thanks for leaving them here for all to enjoy!

  2. Heres one that I thought of: “I know exactly what you need”

  3. Far, far better lines than I ever managed in my heyday.

  4. You know that old grade/high school game where you end every sentence you say with “…in bed!”? Well, the answer to all these pick up lines would be, “Right, buddy, only in…THE TWILIGHT ZONE” :-] Great post, Paul!

  5. I can’t believe how many posts I haven’t commented on, Boss. :-/ This one is definitely a fun one. Gotta go with #4 as my favourite though. And of course #6! #1 is also fantastic. Oh, who am I kidding? All of these would work on me if they came from the right person. ;)

    • Glad you enjoyed it, GF! TZ is a serious place most of the time, so it’s good to loosen up and be a little silly now and then. This was definitely fun to do. And hey, you picked the same favorites I did! :)

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